Tuesday, 24 July 2012

The alternative reality

In my mind I dream of unknown places. See, I dream alot. I dream of fresh flowers, beautiful sunsets, very cold winters, a place far from here... Part of me is stuck in an alternate reality, in a fairytale book or a sweet song, where no one gets hurt, and everything is perfect and gets resolved. I'm in love with the idea of love. It didn't take a boy, or an unforgettable kiss to make me realize this, it took long conversations (mostly over some wine sessions)... with very good friends.

 To me love is much more than loving an individual, or even loving yourself. It's about loving life, loving this earth that we inhabit, loving the spirit that fills our soul (whatever that may be), and loving being alive. The most frustrating thing about love is that no one can give you that love of life, not any self help books, or therapists, or even religious figures. (...though they may help.) It's something you find within yourself. I finally realized that a while, I was afraid of living I was just existing.

 I want to LIVE. Not just experience the joys of life, but the pain too. I want to LOVE. Not just have a perfect relationship, but have flaws too. I WANT to be hurt, I want to be a complete mess (just like I was yesterday), I want to live in a foreign city where I know no one, and they don't know me. Because anything is better than feeling nothing. Nothing is lonely, nothing is cold. Nothing is giving up. I vow to live and to love from this day forward. To love myself, to love life, and the earth we inhabit, to love the spirit that fills my soul, and to love being alive. 

This is in Mozambique, Vamizi Island! Sun sets above the ocean...the earth is too amazing, too beautiful! Photo by Erwan 

"Its a brand new day, a brand new life and Im feeling good"-Nina Simone

"she said she usually cried at least once each day... not because she was sad, but because the world was so beautiful and life was so short" 
-Unknown-



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